February 2010
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Gawker Grammy Liveblog →
Meanwhile, T-Pain just revealed himself by taking off a white wig, and they cut to Mr. Death of Autotune himself, Jay-Z, who now looks simply confused. He’s not alone. Doug E. Fresh gets on stage, and then, Slash gets on stage. Did you ever mix all four flavors of Slurpee available to you? That’s something like this, except: it doesn’t suck ass, make you feel old, or give you a...
January 2010
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“Excuse me. You don’t teach a child that age about rape.”
– Random and otherwise normal-looking woman, apropos of nothing, to me, my wife, and 13-month-old son, in a Central Park playground. (via chrismohney)
How this doesn’t merit any response other than FUCK OFF LADY is beyond me.
Speaking of Dick Size
It’s one of the many things covered here. This is about as oversharey as I’m ever going to get, but we had a pretty good time writing this one.
Cayte started IMing me questions for some piece she was working on, and she asked me to speak candidly, so I did. And then I hear a “WOAH” come from Willa’s desk upon which I discovered Cayte’s first draft, which was a...
meaghano:
fek:
AND WHAT ORDER IS THIS IN?
Oh yeah, by the way: I’m doing this.
IN ORDER OF DICK SIZE.
Smaller than Melissa, bigger than Diana. Sounds about right.
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meaghano:
matthewgallaway:
Yall, rlly happy to participate but feel kinda sad that my name was changed to ‘more.’
—Zephyr more
‘Join the Tumblr community for an open bar reception and live performance to celebrate writing, reading, and the art of the second draft. Writers from the popular blogging platform will share their work, make you laugh, and save the Internet from their waning...
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But really, WHO is "DAT"?
I just want to know if he/she needs a CityFile page, or if Saints fans are just fucking retarded.
So, Apparently, I Hired John Mayer to Blog for... →
Success?
I'm having an increasingly hard time reconciling...
chrismohney:
This includes people who share the last opinion. Maybe even especially them. I’ll be first over the edge.
I “liked” this post.
The Literary Womangirls of Brooklyn.
ninety9:
1. They will sleep with you. 2. They will write a book about your sex life and its discontents. 3. They will not like it when you mention its odd that a significant component of their identity seems to be built around their sex life and its discontents, and not like that you point out they never discuss that with any sense of self-reflection. It’s not them. It’s you.
Vice: HUFFINGTON POST HAS A HUGE GRADE SCHOOL...
vicemag:
We don’t know if we’re at the nexus of some sort of synergistical psycholinguic planetary alignment of the cosmos or Huffpo’s just got some kid on staff who spends his morning railing speed and looking for colloquial phrases to literalize. Either way, right now we feel like the conduit for some pretty heavy, transdimensional-type power whose capabilities we’re only beginning to...
remember, Salinger really didnt like any of you
youngmanhattanite:
(via dhk)
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THE KINDLE CAN SUCK A DONG.
Just saying.
Today, in Bad Motherfuckers: F. Murray Abraham →
Abraham snapped into action, scuffling backstage with the thief, who only managed to make off with Martha Plimpton’s bag and another actress’s wallet.
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In Defense of “Retarded” →
Even though it’s a by-the-book denotation of the truth, we’ve crafted a plethora of politically correct sounding alternatives that aren’t necessarily that politically correct or inoffensive in and of themselves, because they’re patronizing. Examples:
Special: If by “special” you mean “genetically deformed.” Or “can’t be trusted with sharp objects and not for lack of good intentions.”
...
Open Letter to Jimmy Dolan
Dear Mr. Dolan:
Between the Knicks, suing Remy Stern, and this:
The web site redesign and relaunch cost the Dolans $4 million, according to Mr. Jimenez. With those 35 people, they’ve grossed about $9,000. In that time, without question, web traffic has begun to plummet, and, certainly, advertising will follow as well…. ….Mr. Jimenez was in no mood to apologize....
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Anything About This Byline Stick Out?
Brad Stone reported from San Francisco and Stephanie Clifford from New York. Richard Pérez-Peña contributed reporting from New York and Brian Stelter from Las Vegas.
Ahem.
The Poet Dating His Much-Younger Former Student →
The Sex Diaries totally just stepped up their game. Especially this:
9 p.m.: Worried that one potential roommate is too sexy, and that I couldn’t manage not to eventually try something if I gave her the room. Current Roommate suggests that I go for it, and then afterward just constantly bring home other chicks until she gets mad and moves out. Current Roommate writes the advice column in a...
YAY. →
jeffbaum:
fek:
(via katiebakes)
Sorry, but BOO. I’m all for a new National record, but christ, this is not a band that should be playing Radio City Music Hall. No band should! Rock bands were meant for Rock Venues. The National did a five night run at the Bowery in 2007; why don’t they do it again? Not the worst idea.
Yeah, that seems fair. They should basically double the length of their...
A fake empire.
katiebakes:
fek:
Sorry, but BOO. I’m all for a new National record, but christ, this is not a band that should be playing Radio City Music Hall. No band should! Rock bands were meant for Rock Venues. The National did a five night run at the Bowery in 2007; why don’t they do it again? Not the worst idea.
Easy solution: let’s go watch them at the Electric Factory in Philly. I love that...
YAY. →
(via katiebakes)
Sorry, but BOO. I’m all for a new National record, but christ, this is not a band that should be playing Radio City Music Hall. No band should! Rock bands were meant for Rock Venues. The National did a five night run at the Bowery in 2007; why don’t they do it again? Not the worst idea.
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Art, Schooled: Handicapping New York's Gallery... →
K -
You did an amazing job with today’s piece. When you write about anything, but especially art, you know you have succeeded when people are huge fuckfaces about it. Visceral fuckfaceism is, in some way, one of the most surefire indicators of success.
[Ask Eli. He apparently caused the earthquake in Haiti.]
Do not despair, do not back down, and keep doing wonderful things like bringing...
Cayte Visits Vegas
caytegrieve:
i’ve felt undeserving of ‘treatment’ and press trips before. I’ve felt guilty as well. but this was seriously the first time I felt ridiculous for enjoying something free in the name of work.
But the City Center is trying to send a message. and they needed the 102 journalists that flooded the city center from tuesday to friday of this past week to get out their message. Vegas isn’t...
Future of fashion magazines
homeofthevain:
Fashion magazines should take note. At the end of the day, they will stay in business not by selling us clothes or by feeding us something we’ve seen hundreds of times before, but by allowing our imaginations to take flight. The Internet can give us runway pictures and analysis faster than any print publication ever could, but it hasn’t yet figured out a way to capture the...
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“I have never been more grateful for an official, band-sanctioned online lyric...”
– Phoenix’s ‘1901’ > 2009
Rob Harvilla wrote a really nice essay about Phoenix’s total inscrutability, and how that somehow makes their songs ever better. By the way, this was one of a small handful of occasions where I’m reading something on public transportation and my mind goes “Hey, that...
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Damn. Really went off the rails this morning.
X-Tina Agularia doing “X Gone Give It To You.” Okay, so she actually did “Lift Me Up” and it was the best performance of the night. There. Now give money to Haiti, you fucking pieces of ungrateful, awful shit.
Sleep…wouldn’t be a bad idea tonight.
Nikki Finke's Trademark TOLDJA! Hypocrisy:... →
That said, this is a win-win situation for everyone. If the paperwork goes through, Finke gets her trademark. The rest of us get one of the most annoying phrases in the history of the King’s taken off the table for good. In fact, in her spirit, we hereby call for Finke—and you—to vigorously enforce Finke’s trademark with the same moxie with which she polices her beat. If you see or...
ninety9:
Why do I get the idea that FEK is preemptively irritated by Abe Sauer?
Because I am. You mess with her, you mess with all of us. The astroturf has been soiled.
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ninety9:
Why do I get the idea that Abe Sauer is preemptively irritated by Bakes?
Because she’s a NICE PERSON MAYBE?!
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Please Welcome To The Tumblspace: Glynnis MacNicol
First follows: Sklar, Carney, Me, Mediaite, Newsweek.
Lost Producers Plan on Fucking Up Your Week with...
YES.
Mr. Cuse and fellow executive producer Damon Lindelof praise the ambiguity of the final minutes of another series, “The Sopranos.” It left some viewers grumbling about not knowing exactly what happened to the New Jersey mob boss who quietly sat in a diner with his family as the eight-year epic faded to black.
But they liked that viewers got to go with their own interpretation....
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Dangerous Ideas
cajunboy:
You know what, fuck Lil Wayne’s traitor ass!
I mean, if it’s you, sure, but us smaller guys have to worry about his posse coming after us for that kind of thing. Assuming they’re not messed up on the sizzurp.
The Ultimate Deadspin Post
Have you ever met someone who jerked off so much it fucked up his knee? That’s me, motherfuckers.
Wow. I don’t think there are even Fleshbot readers who can say that.
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My Monetization Plan for Tumblr
$100, and you get to block someone’s IP from ever using it. Ever. Your pick.
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