WE ARE YOUR FEK

jessicacoen: Well-played. This is like that first game of...

Tue, 22 May 2012 18:28:32 -0400

Well-played.

This is like that first game of Tic-Tac-Toe in Wargames, except it’s me and The Black Bloc of Jezebel Commenters, and I will win, by which I mean, drive a few of them to put large, gaping holes in their $2,000 MacBooks that will make them consider their existence of living to condemn everything they read as an affront to whatever stripe of politicization they feel like cluster-bombing the Internet with that day.

I’m almost always anti on food-photography, but I found...

Tue, 22 May 2012 12:09:54 -0400

I’m almost always anti on food-photography, but I found this shot oddly wonderful. Also, the FUKUMOMO shirts.

breathes in paper bag

Mon, 21 May 2012 19:29:59 -0400

*breathes in paper bag*

Boys Who Talk About Girls: And Now, a Black Guy Weighs In

Mon, 21 May 2012 18:02:58 -0400

Boys Who Talk About Girls: And Now, a Black Guy Weighs In:

For all the obvious reasons, my Jezebel column on Girls is some of the most fun I’ve had all year.

Also, happy fifth birthday to Jezebel. Somewhere in America, a 16 year-old guy has Googled this piece about getting a tampon stuck inside of one for ten days, and his life has been forever changed.

If that’s not a legacy for a blog, I don’t know what is.

Are New York City’s Taxis About to Become Significantly More Expensive?

Mon, 21 May 2012 17:20:41 -0400

Are New York City’s Taxis About to Become Significantly More Expensive? :

Yep.

Photo

Fri, 18 May 2012 16:07:16 -0400

Hey Foster, Thanks for your email and interest. We are not doing any press or media tomorrow so unfortunately will be unable to participate. Best, Cameron Sent from my iPhone

Fri, 18 May 2012 13:23:48 -0400

Hey Foster, Thanks for your email and interest. We are not doing any press or media tomorrow so unfortunately will be unable to participate. Best, Cameron Sent from my iPhone:

Someone’s wearing a big :( today. Or rather, someone who has a someone-lookalike.

Cat Marnell Goes to Rehab

Thu, 17 May 2012 17:54:00 -0400

Cat Marnell Goes to Rehab:

Hello,

My name is Cat Marnell, I live in NYC, and I am an influential and popular, high profile health and beauty editor for media icon Jane Pratt. I write and edit online on xojane.com with a huge loyal following; New York Magazine just interviewed me for a profile, for example — look for it! I am very influential. [ED NOTE: Remember, I was trying to get free rehab, okay? I am not really this awful!]

A few words later:

I also now am a heavy abuser of PCP, cocaine (snorting and smoking), MDMA and ecstasy, benzos, sleepings pills, painkillers, sometimes crack, on and off again heroin (snorted, at this point in my life at least), various “legal highs”, and though I don’t have problems with them, alcohol and marijuana. So I believe that I truly need Narconon’s guidance.

A few words after that:

Now I have this huge platform of readers — my articles get approximately 100K views per month [ED. NOTE: I have no idea how many views I get; this was completely made up] — but now, as of Friday — I have been put, against my will (and at a massive pay cut) on disability.

Cat is a terrifying, wonderful, hilarious, and generally great creature.

Seeking—Hipster Types: male and female, 18-30s, all ethnicities, all types, specifically seeking people with tattoos, piercings, colored hair, and unique looks. Young Adult (ages 18-29), Thirties (ages 30-39). Caucasian/White, African-American/Black, Latin/Hispanic/South American, Asian, Native American, European, Middle Eastern, Indian/South Asian, Other.

Thu, 17 May 2012 15:31:00 -0400

Seeking—Hipster Types: male and female, 18-30s, all ethnicities, all types, specifically seeking people with tattoos, piercings, colored hair, and unique looks. Young Adult (ages 18-29), Thirties (ages 30-39). Caucasian/White, African-American/Black, Latin/Hispanic/South American, Asian, Native American, European, Middle Eastern, Indian/South Asian, Other.:

The Second Season of Girls: More ‘Authentic’ and ‘United Colors of Benetton’-like than ever.

fimoculous: ANIMAL relaunched, now inside Mother. Also now...

Wed, 16 May 2012 13:03:16 -0400

fimoculous:

ANIMAL relaunched, now inside Mother. Also now including Ill Doctrine.

These guys.

Graffiti artist Kidult has exacted his revenge on Marc Jacobs.

Tue, 15 May 2012 18:43:21 -0400

Graffiti artist Kidult has exacted his revenge on Marc Jacobs.

Photo

Tue, 15 May 2012 17:45:28 -0400

My column on Girls for Jezebel is up. Every time I do it, I...

Mon, 14 May 2012 18:38:19 -0400

My column on Girls for Jezebel is up.

Every time I do it, I think of making the title “Meowchwitz” for the small cross-section of People Who Read That and Archer fans. One day, I will.

This is already really…something.

JP Morgan Uberflack (and Jamie Dimon’s Spokesperson) Joseph Evangelisti Just Became $6.7M Richer With Apartment Sale

Mon, 14 May 2012 18:26:17 -0400

JP Morgan Uberflack (and Jamie Dimon’s Spokesperson) Joseph Evangelisti Just Became $6.7M Richer With Apartment Sale

So, everyone wants to know – streets are talking, suburbs, exurbs – you [Jay-Z] recently played Jenga for the first time, at 42 years old. What was that like? When was the last time you lost at something?

Mon, 14 May 2012 17:06:37 -0400

So, everyone wants to know – streets are talking, suburbs, exurbs – you [Jay-Z] recently played Jenga for the first time, at 42 years old. What was that like? When was the last time you lost at something?

youngmanhattanite: Every generation gets the Refresh Refresh...

Mon, 14 May 2012 15:47:02 -0400

youngmanhattanite:

Every generation gets the Refresh Refresh Refresh it deserves.

Photo

Mon, 14 May 2012 15:27:13 -0400

Marc Jacobs vs. The Graffiti Artist, Round 2: When Jacobs Turns Vandalized Store Into $680 Shirt

Fri, 11 May 2012 15:35:40 -0400

Marc Jacobs vs. The Graffiti Artist, Round 2: When Jacobs Turns Vandalized Store Into $680 Shirt

Fallen under the spell of Fifty Shades of Grey? If you’re curious about how to try out some of the scenes from the book, we’ll discuss ways to make your fantasies into reality. At this cocktail party, bring your girlfriends or your lover and get inspired to try new things in the bedroom.

Thu, 10 May 2012 17:26:58 -0400

Fallen under the spell of Fifty Shades of Grey? If you’re curious about how to try out some of the scenes from the book, we’ll discuss ways to make your fantasies into reality. At this cocktail party, bring your girlfriends or your lover and get inspired to try new things in the bedroom.

Pat Kiernan, West Side Story-Edition

Thu, 10 May 2012 16:54:33 -0400

Pat Kiernan, West Side Story-Edition:

SHOTS FIRED, Nick Lachey.